Missing Home

All of the windows in the house are open, at least the ones that do open. The others are over 80 years-old and have been caulked or painted shut and I could only afford to replace so many at once. I’m sitting on the couch with a pillow behind my back, on my lap with my laptop ironically stationed their while I write.


I’d rather be outside writing, but I couldn’t figure out how to balance all of this on my swing, with my pregnant belly creating my balancing point and my feet stopping short of the porch floor. So the next best thing on the couch, windows open over my head to the right, in-direct light pouring in. I can hear the outside things I like cicadas, birds, crickets, church bells (ringing twelve) and of course the things I could do without car wheels wooshing by on the pavement, dogs in the background growing closer and farther away, my neighbor yelling back in her gravel voice to one of five dogs who’s favorite pastime is barking. With the music off, I can hear my computer fan smothered by the pillow on my lap trying to get enough air. Someone is yelling, a whistle is blowing and still cars woosh by, sometimes with music sliding out their windows, uncaught harmonies as diverse as the people driving. The cicadas have the most to say with their sentences rising in a heavy pitch before falling silent for a second and starting again. Something I just read on the Internet said they are most active in morning before it becomes 80 degrees. Today it’s only supposed to be 73, so does that mean they will chat with me all day? I miss my woods in Meadow Valley. With only three houses past mine, if I hear a car against the gravel, it is occasion to look out the window with the thought “who is on my road?” And even then I was irritated by those folks just driving home.


I want to be a writer, just a writer, noticing what happens around me, writing about it, letting others experience it. I want everything else to go away.

ADD and me

It's late - really late for someone who's seven months pregnant and needs to work tomorrow.  The good news about ADD is that when I settle into someone I can stay with it for a while and maybe - that's why I try not to settle too often.  I find myself sitting at the computer on skipping around from facebook to hotmail, to gmail to my work e-mail looking for something quick and easy to do. It let's me check something off the to-do list that I never create.  I have tried that, creating a to-do list.  And its funny when I do - at least if you're not me.  I'll start creaing it by pulling together one of my piles and even before I have written down the 3rd thing on it, I have started doing one and two. Sometimes, the things I have to do - seem so easy, that they look ridculous being on the list. So I'll start making the calls or writing the letters or putting my clothes away only to get distracted by something else.  Really I'm amazed that I get anything done.  So that fact that I'm sitting at my computer two years after I first created a blog that I have never added any posts and doing that - nothing short of a miracle.  Here's to good thoughts and new starts.